Get More Confidence and Clarity Right Meow.
Money is central to most of our lives, whether we’re actors or accountants. But what I’ve realized through my own internal work and through the internal work of my clients is that when we struggle with money, the main issues aren’t really with the green stuff.
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Financial hardship is a multi-layered struggle, but the difficulties are often the direct result of something deeper. Most of the time, we get in our own way.
Take, for example, this thought process: “I hate this job and I wish I could quit. But I can’t quit because I need money. But this job doesn’t pay me enough. But I don’t know what else I want to do. Oh well.” Sound familiar? I know I’ve felt this way before. We have a tendency to talk ourselves into being stuck somewhere, and oftentimes it comes down to fear or some variety of belief like “I can’t do any better than this.”
It isn’t an easy process, going digging. But once we can identify and work with our deeper beliefs and struggles, the effects spread to every part of life. Imagine - butter spreading on warm toast (yum). It feels that good too.
Photo by Miguel Bruna
SO…where to start? I’ve got a suggestion.
How about some internal reflection? Coaching takes a little leg work and awareness, after all. Try out this exercise I have my groups do. It’s easy, will take about 10 minutes, and can bring attention to aspects of yourself that you might need to notice first in order to bring about the changes you desire.
AN EXERCISE FOR REFLECTION.
This is a sort of free association exercise. I want you to read each phrase individually, and try it on to see how it fits. Maybe say it out loud like it’s yours. Next, write down anything and everything that comes to mind or body in response. Really notice what’s going on inside when you read these, writing down everything you can. Don’t worry about grammar, punctuation, or fancy wording. Just be honest with yourself. Spend about 2 minutes on each phrase.
-I belong here.
-I know what I’m doing.
-My goals are reachable.
-My work is important.
-I have unique skill.
-I deserve success.
What did you notice?
Which of these statements did you resist, and why? Which scared you? Which did you agree with whole-heartedly? Which would you like to be true? What surprised you? What sort of thoughts did each phrase generate?
In coaching, your reactions to these serve as trail heads for deeper reflection - an opportunity to dig deeper and perhaps achieve some understanding about where you are, and why. If you want to continue to dig and learn how to break the stuck loop, email me to continue the conversation: emily@ek.coach.
xo
Photo by Caju Gomes
