A Few Things to Know About Your Brain.
Did you know your brain has the consistency of custard? It’s not solid like a muscle…it’s like flan. Not a hugely important detail to what I discuss here, but just a fun fact to ruin desert forever.
Another fun fact:
Your brain is completely unique in how it processes the world.
I’m sure you’ve heard that you have neurons in your brain, and they fire in response to stimulus in the outside world. We each have something like 100 billion neurons in our brains, so it’s chaos in there. No 2 people have the same neural pathways or firings, even down to the basics.
I.E., PAIN. The way you interpret pain in your cortex has virtually no similarity to any other person. It’s one of the simplest functions of the brain - it isn’t complex information received - but still, every person’s neurons fire completely differently. There is no discernible pattern.
So, basically, you are completely unique in your processing. If someone tries to tell you the solution to one of your own issues, their interpretation comes from their own experience, and their interpretations of that experience. There’s no evidence that their solution and process will work for you like it does for them.
It’s so easy to assume other people have the answers for us. It’s also easy to look to others to resolve our problems. It’s hard work (not to mention risky) to chase what we know to be right for us, because what if we fail?
This is a quick road to creating internal doubt and low self-confidence. If you can’t be trusted with your own solutions, what CAN you be trusted with?
I’m definitely not saying to ignore all advice or the solutions others have for similar problems, because those solutions could help you on the road to figuring out the answers that are right for you. BUT, don’t accept a solution just because someone offers it…make sure it feels right to you. And you definitely know what feels right, and what doesn’t.
This is one of the tenets of coaching. As a coach, I assume YOU have everything you need to be successful and happy. Don’t let that overwhelm or frustrate you, especially if you’re feeling stuck. Instead, consider the empowerment! A great coach is there to support you in discovering, uncovering, and achieving whatever is right for you - it’s a team effort. But that coach will never assume they have the correct answers FOR you. Especially considering what we know down to a scientific level - your brain and experience is completely unique, down to the basics!
One more thing to know about your brain…
When you go for a run for the first time in ages and you get to the point that you’re feeling the pain…or if you’re giving your first presentation in front of a new team…or you walk into a new job with new responsibilities…
The discomfort you feel in these moments is actually a really good thing. Stress in MANAGEABLE DOSES and pushing your comfort zone on the regular increases your brain elasticity. That means living well, longer!
(Side note…chronic stress is a bad thing, that’ll have damaging effects on your body. If that’s happening, you and I should talk about managing that stress.)
If it’s out of your comfort zone, KEEP DOING IT. That’s how your brain knows to create change! New neural pathways, new connections, expanding your understanding and boundaries of comfort…they make your brain stronger, and your life better. Push through the discomfort, it’s good for you!!
Let’s continue the conversation - firstname.lastname@example.org.